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Bachin’ It (Hour 2)

Wow, hour 2 just began and Michelle is really kicking it into high gear, putting Jake on the spot and asking if he feels anything for her and if he’ll kiss her. He looks super uncomfortable but concedes and kisses her (sigh). And oh my God, the kiss! Horrid. She looks like a junkyard dog attacking a bone.

After, she says, “You gotta give me something more than that,” and he averts his eyes. Then she tells him she wants to go home and he agrees. Whoa. This is probably the first time Jake has done anything smart since this show started. He called her bluff and sent her home. I am kinda shocked that the producers didn’t force him to keep her on the show, though, because that girl would have provided plenty of coo-coo fodder for the rest of the season.  Prediction: she will come back later in the season in a dramatic stand-off moment. Come on, it’s the Bachelor: someone has to come back in a dramatic stand-off moment.

So, Ella and Jake go to Sea World. Did the helicopter also take them back to 1993? I honestly didn’t know Sea World still existed. I guess I thought it imploded or something the moment Willy was set free. Anyway, it was cute that Jake flew out Ella’s kid for the date, but does anyone else find it a tad disturbing that Ella left her kid behind in the first place to come on a reality show? Because I kinda do. I guess I can’t judge since I am not in her position, but I am pretty sure if I were a single mom, I wouldn’t leave my small child behind for weeks and weeks while I go on a notoriously cheezy (and actually pretty skanky) reality dating show to try to find a husband. I mean, join eHarmony or something, Ella.

In any case, Ella’s little boy is really cute. I hope that Jake and Ella don’t kiss in front of him… okay, they didn’t. Whew.  Actually, I sort of like Ella and wouldn’t mind if she and Jake ended up together, since he seems cool with the fact that she has a kid and everything, and she seems like a nice lady.  And I like her accent! I’m easily charmed, apparently.

Moving on to Elizabeth. Seems like Jake finally picked up on the fact that she’s playing games with him. And I love that he actually called her a tease. She bugs the crap out of me. I stand by what I said last week. Pech.

K, rose ceremony! The moment we’ve all been anxiously awaiting! Why do I feel like I’ve never seen half the girls he keeps on? Are they extras? I’m confused. Anyway, I am very glad that he sent creepy Elizabeth home. She was bad news. She’ll probably go on to marry some old man on his death bed, steal his vast fortunes, and have an affair with the pool boy. She seems like the type. I did feel bad when the other random chick he sent home (Valishia? Who the heck is she?) was crying. She’ll get over it, though.

Onwards and upwards, ladies.


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