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You’re a virgin who can’t drive.

K, so I really would be remiss If I didn’t post a link to the preview for the new TLC reality special airing Sunday, The Virgin Diaries.

I’ll just let that video sink in for a moment.  The awful butterfly kisses. The horrifying face chomping. The even more horrifying face sucking.

Has it sunk in yet?


Here’s my take on this business: adult virginity is not spectacle-worthy unless people choose to make it so.  I mean, who cares if people choose not to have sex as adults? That seems like a private decision and not something particularly interesting. But the people who signed up for this show want to trot out their virginity for all to see, and dang it, I’m gonna watch it. It’s like the reality TV Field of Dreams: if you broadcast it, Stephanie will watch. They wanted to make their virginity a spectacle, and they have succeeded marvelously. Uncomfortable spectacle is what good TV is all about. This is why I sometimes (always) watch Sister Wives.

Some people are complaining that TLC appears to be poking fun at these hapless virgins and even exploiting them, but remember – no one ever holds a gun to your head and forces you to go on a reality show. This ain’t the Hunger Games, peeps. Those virgins all want to be on TV, talkin’ bout their virginity and chompin’ on each other’s faces. Plus, let’s be real, there’s WAY worse stuff being revealed on TV every day (see, e.g., any episode of the Kardashians where any of them do anything).

So, whatever, bring on the virgins. And also, I really hope for that couple’s sake they learn how to kiss appropriately, or else they’re going to be the Most Embarrassing Parents Ever.


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